Living in CHAOS! or Blog Party, part One

Hey, you!

What are you doing here? Blog party? Is it the 7th already? Oh, god, it is!

Well, don't just stand there in the doorway, come in. I'm not really ready yet, though. You know how it is, living with a four year old... CHAOS everywhere (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome!) Sorry about the mess... oh, careful, you don't want to sit on the sofa just yet. My daughter likes to hide stuff under the couch cushions. Come on in the kitchen. You can lean in the doorway and we'll just chat while I get the dishes done, okay?

Hmmm? Oh, my dress! You like it? So do I. It's just my housedress, but it's really comfy... and it's so colorful, you can't really tell that I've spilled things on it. No, seriously, see those spots? That's bleach, from when I had a bleach pen explode on me a few months ago.

Would you like some chili? I've got the crock pot going. Oh, no, don't worry, it's vegetarian. Only three weight watchers points per serving. I made it with those Soy crumbles, and even Thomas, the "I did not claw my way to the top of the food chain to eat veggies" guy? He couldn't tell the difference. I've got some chopped onions in the fridge, if you want, and there's hot sauce in the breakfront there. No, up one shelf, there. Behind all my Crystal Light flavor tubes. There ya go. Oh, you probably don't want that one. I got given that one as a joke, and it's claw your eyeballs out hot. Yeah, cute bottle, though. Well, maybe not " Cute", exactly. My step dad gave it to me, and he's Texan. You know how those Texans are...

Ah, I'm glad you like it. Yeah, the canned corn adds something to chili, I'm not sure quite what, tho. Little crunch, maybe. I like using the different colored beans, too. Kidney, black beans, navy beans... makes the dish look more fun.

Well, if you're done just toss the bowl in the dish-washer, I'm almost ready to start the load up. Of course you can help, my goodness, we don't stand on ceremony here. The broom's in the closet. My mom used to have this poem on her kitchen wall, but I'm not like that.

Please stay away from my kitchen,
From my dishwashing, cooking and such.
You were kind to have offered to help me,
And I do want to thank you so much.
I hope you won't think me ungracious
When I ask that you leave me alone,
For my kitchen is not very spacious
And my system is strictly my own.
So please stay away of my kitchen,
It may well prevent a few wars,
And if I am invited to your house,
I promise I'll stay out of yours.

Yeah, I think it's cute, too. Not that she really meant it, you know. My grandmother never did, either. The first time my dad brought my mom to his house to meet his mom, she was standing in the doorway, just like you are now, making polite conversation. And my grandmother threw the broom at her. "As long as you're standing there, you may as well sweep the floor."

I promise, though, I won't throw anything at you.

I don't think I caught your name, though. I know, open invitation party and all, it gets hard to keep track of everyone. Fun, though.

Oh, me? Yeah, ok. I'm Lynn. I'm a 35 year old housewife in southern Virginia. I have a bachelor's degree in Victorian Literature (Would you like fries with that?) and I've written a couple novels that haven't been published yet. That raisinette in the bathroom who's been in the tub for over an hour now? That's my daughter, Darcy. She's four. Oh, I said that already, didn't I? Yeah, she's our only. I wouldn't mind another one, though. I love babies.

Oh dear. Sorry about that, yeah, my hand weights. I was working out yesterday and I didn't put them away. They're only three pounders, but I'm working my way up. (Working my weight down? Sorry, bad pun. I know, I know.) Hey, at least I put the tennis rackets away!

Ok, well, you just mingle, and I'm going to get these cheesecake parfaits started. Yeah, I can give you the recipe later, just remind me...

*Update: I have posted the cheesecake recipe here.

If selected, these are the prizes I'm most interested in: 56, 41, 103, 76, 8, 24, 58, 60, and 90 Or anything else to do with scrapbooking, being the mom of a 4 year old girlie girl, or nutrition/diet stuff.